What is Beasthood

Beasthood Incorporated is something I started for determined individuals who know the difference between Reasons & Excuses. Things in life will hit you at the most unexpected times and what I've noticed is that lack of Preparation is the reason we take so long to get back on track. Therefore, your biggest enemy... is You. You can now begin to sit there and think to yourself, "This negro don't know me" and come up with a billion and one EXCUSES as to why you aren't at least on the path of where you want to be, OR... you can name the very few REASONS why and then formulate a plan to overcome them. 
Nothing can Stop You, Except You... Like It, Learn It, Live It

Friday, December 31, 2010

Got Jokes Huh?



I have seen a resurgence of the popular past time form of joke telling called "Roasting". Now, I didn't know what it was because in NY we just called it Clowning and then in Bmore a small circle of us called it "Clock time," in which we made jokes with a Symbolic Chess Clock in front of us and if you couldn't make a joke in a couple seconds then you lost.
Now it seems people are doing it to be popular online, which is pretty lame, but whatever; not everybody has self respect, I guess. But nonetheless, I think all "Roasts" should have a time limit. If it takes you 5mins to come up with a non Intelligent joke like, "You look like a Radioactive Turd" {'~' }™ , chances are you should just stop!

 But I do have a newfound saying, "If you're gonna be LAME, do that sh*t to the MAX!" So... for you 'Be Lame-For-Fame' Style Roasters here's a few tips to increase your RT's and follower Count:



Basic Algebraic Formula:
Obscure(Country+ Animal)
Ex: You look like a Mongolian Praying Mantis
The good thing about most of these jokes is that 95% of the times the person looks NOTHING like the animal but it sounds funny so people can't help but to laugh. If you think I'm lying then you look like a Filipino Coy Fish when you Kiss

The Tag Team:
Tag people who are funny so that you can Ask for Help, without actually appear like you're asking for help.
Ex. Yo @JohnnyMagma look at this ugly mofo @RandomTwitterName,
don't he look like a Antarctic Snow Beaver?

Unfortunately, this happens DAILY and so many names get tagged that a decent joke is almost never possible.

TT Roast:
Use the current Trending Topics up on the board, or one that you are about to put on the board (if you are one of the "Kings/Queens of Twitter" {'~' }™ This will increase your exposure Tremendously because there are literally millions of people on TT's at any given time that will see it even if they aren't following you.
Ex. #MarcusBJoke(s) if you don't know of that hashtag, thank your lucky stars you've never had to suffer through what can only be explained as a Nicki Minaj rap style Roast with random capitalized words typed with the intelligence of a Lil B punchline.
The Only 2 Universally Successfully executed Hashtag style roasts are #Rhamu (which Trended Worldwide by the way) followed by #BoywaltsVest. If you weren't in on those then you just missed it... Sorry.

Another benefit of this is the fact that the trend can be explained (via Apps and/or WhatTheTrend.com) and therefore be a permanent record of the Hilarity that ensued if it becomes popular enough.
Ex: #BoyWaltsVest => whatthetrend.com/trend/boywaltsvest


Have Fun "Roasters" your Cyber Life depends on it... Word to the wise though, anyone following these guidelines will typically get labeled a Lame Ass and be unfollowed just as quickly as you were followed. Your interest factor will decrease severely because when you see how the magician does his trick... it's just not as Mesmerizing.

Moral of the Story: If you have to Try to be funny, then You aren't Funny!!



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